Anxious-Less

This post will provide 10 evidence based and proven tips to help you lessen your anxiety.

As my previous post let you know, reports of anxiety have increased significantly since 2016.

Most notably (and more concerning) anxiety is now the most common mental illness in the United States.

Anxiety has impacted over 40 million Americans ages 18+.

Even more people are struggling to manage their anxiety and stress.

Let’s break down some proven coping strategies to help you manage your anxiety and start living an anxious-less life.

1. Find out if anxiety is the real issue.

The first step in managing your anxiety consists of a little education.

Some people struggle with social anxiety, and others experience panic disorders.

Luckily for you, there are options for helping you better understand if you may in fact be grappling with an anxiety disorder.

You can even use a self-screen tool that takes only about 2 minutes to find out if you may actually be struggling with anxiety.

2. Learn to accept yourself.

You are beautiful, loved, and perfectly imperfect.

Know that no one on this planet can stroll around and assert themselves as a “perfect” person, who has never made a mistake.

My first word of advice is to learn to accept yourself, flaws and all.

Each and everyone of us is prone to and capable of making beautiful mistakes in this life.

It can be common for anxiety to be connected to low feelings of self-worth.

Confession: I’ve struggled with this throughout my own life. Significant symptoms of social anxiety first occurred when I was in high school (go figure).

My goal is to help others dealing with similar circumstances to know that you should never feel ashamed for admitting and living your truth.

Looking back in hindsight—I recall being hyper aware of others’ perceptions of me.

I would constantly amend and change or critique my own behavior and appearance according to what others thought or said about me- and voila , anxiety and low self-esteem was born.

In fact, a recent study suggests that anxiety is associated with lower feelings of self-acceptance.

If we can learn to develop a stronger sense of self and to truly learn to accept ourselves, we can begin to fight back against the plaguing symptoms of anxiety.

How to learn to love yourself:

• Watch your internal dialogue—if you find yourself sending negative messages , try to catch yourself and reframe this and put a more positive spin on it.
• Negative Inner Voice: “I’m not attractive enough
• Positive Spin: “I’m not perfect but I accept myself for who I am. I do happen to have nice ____ (insert something that you DO like about yourself)
• FYI—this takes time and hard work constantly.
• For more tips on shutting down your inner critic, make sure to check out my other post too.
• Affirmations (Positive Ones, Please) Try posting notes to yourself around the house, or setting up a recurring text or calendar message that provides a positive affirmation.
• Keep it focused on the main issues you struggle with to help increase your self esteem.
• The company you keep—Those that we choose to surround ourselves with can have a profound impact on what we do, how we think and how we feel about ourselves.
• Evaluate your inner circle or who you choose to spend your time with.
• True friends will challenge you and hold you accountable, but should not bring you down, hurt/shame you or make you feel bad for being yourself.

3. Reality check yourself.

Our mind is a truly powerful weapon. We know that our mind can help us unleash our full potential, accomplish things we never imagined possible, and also keep us sick.

Let me elaborate—our behaviors and emotions are controlled by the messages we send ourselves.

We’re constantly observing the world around us and forming opinions and ideas about what’s occurring. Our brain then informs us how we should respond. Sometimes, we get it wrong.

Sometimes our anxiety is informed by the problematic messages we tell ourselves so it can become necessary to “check ourselves” or call ourselves on our bullshit. Excuse my french.

So the next time you’re having an anxious thought- take a moment to just stop and ask yourself some questions to check yourself:

How to check reality:

• Is what I think happening actually happening?
• Am I creating this story/scenario that’s making me anxious?
• What can I do for self-care in this moment to lessen my anxiety?

Then, DO it.

4. Create a stress management plan.

Having a reminder of that fact that we have skills and the power to control our life circumstances and lessen our anxiety can be a great tool.

I created a stress management plan and some of the coping techniques listed in this plan can also relate to helping you manage your anxiety.

As you navigate life, keep in mind which activities, people, and environments help you the feel the most connected to your authentic and most relaxed version of yourself.

You can then try to ensure that you have continued access or increased access to the things that truly make you feel good.

I happen to be fortunate enough to have good friends that are basically like family at this point. I’ve been my craziest, funniest, most imperfect self around them and still found acceptance.

We try to schedule meet ups on a regular basis and that has been helpful for me in terms of managing my stress levels and I often find self-care in those meet ups.

5. Listen to music.

Music is essentially universal.

The power of music to communicate messages, form communities, create an emotional connection to the listener and bring about a variety of various emotions is unparalleled.

Personally, music has helped me overcome some of the most challenging and darkest moments of my personal life.

I’ve found connection, community and a way out through the lyrics of artists that I’ll probably never meet.

Nonetheless, I encourage you to take advantage of your favorite musical genre and music to bring about anxiety reduction.

Music has also been known to act as a distraction for those of us struggling with anxiety and can soothe anxiety and even reduce pain.

Start discovering music that you enjoy and can connect with/relate to.

I tend to gravitate towards artists that musically communicate messages around mental health and other topics that I relate to.

Not that you asked but a few of these above mentioned artists are 6Lack, Banks, Allan Rayman, and Travis Scott.

6. Turn your bathroom into a spa.

Not everyone has the resources (or time) to access a luxury spa on a regular basis, or at all.

Fortunately, that doesn’t mean that you can’t incorporate some of the health benefits into your own life and home.

The feelings and sensation associated with warmer temperatures have been shown to help create feelings of relaxation.

I’ve also done this myself (with candles) and can personally attest to the feelings of warmth, relaxation, and serenity that I experienced when in the bath.

How to create a spa-like bath:

• Incorporate candles that omit smells that you enjoy.
• An epsom salt bath has been known to be effective in reducing anxiety—the magnesium sulfates in the salts have been shown to calm anxiety and lower blood pressure.
• Note: Try to stay “mindful” and present as much as possible while in the bath.
• Stay focused on the feeling of warmth, the sensations, the sounds, and your breath.
• Music—Incorporate music into your bath experience and play soothing music while you soak.

7. Do yoga.

Yoga has long been understood to have a myriad of positive health outcomes.

Therefore, yoga has become a common solution for managing symptoms of anxiety.

8. Get help if needed.

If you’re finding that your anxiety has reached a point where it is becoming increasingly difficult to manage every day tasks, it may be time to seek out help.

You should also seek professional guidance and support if you become concerned for your safety.

Take a look at a few resources that can provide support in times of need:

• Crisis Text Line—immediate crisis support via phone.
• Psychology Today—can help you find a dedicated ongoing counselor/psychiatrist in person.
• TalkSpace—online therapy

9. Utilize lavender.

Lavender is known to have many calming effects that can help relieve anxiety.

According to aromatherapy, when lavender makes contact with the skin a calming effect is induced on the central nervous system.

Here are some ideas of how to incorporate lavender easily into your life to start experiencing the benefits immediately:

• Add a bit of lavendar oil to a warm bath.
• Include a bit of lavender in a diffuser for better quality sleep.

10. Do breathing exercises.

Finally, try the 4-7-8 breathing technique. Breathing can help release serotonin in the brain ( a chemical that can help you feel calmer).

How to do the 4-7-8 breathing exercise:

• Breathe in for a count of 4 seconds.
• Hold for a count of 7 seconds.
• Breathe out for a count of 8 seconds.
• Keep trying it until you begin to feel the calming properties.

Lastly, the important thing to note is that you’re not alone in your struggle with anxiety as it’s become the most common ailment in the US.

Try out any of the tips mentioned above and I’m sure you’ll be on your way to living an anxious-less life. Feel free to leave a comment, DM, or email me to let me know how it’s going.

Remember: You’re absolutely capable of living the life you truly want.