Nikola Roumeliotis
Stories (1/0)
Personal Essay: Brain on Repeat
“Our ability to handle life's challenges is a measure of our strength of character”—Les Brown. I can barely remember my life without the number nine coming up on a daily basis like there was a tape recorder on repeat in my brain. I was diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder early in 2014. I would wash my hands nine times and a nightly and morning routine that needed to be repeated nine times. It wasn’t until the Christmas holidays in late December, however, when things really became unbearable. That was when I started having the disconcerting feeling that nothing was real. Everything was in my head. I felt like I could reach through my stomach and feel my intestines through my skin. In my head, my parents, my friends, my life wasn’t real. I thought that strange occurrence was just a one-time thing, but it wasn’t the end; it was merely just the beginning. Months later, I would be diagnosed with a “derealization disorder.” It was bearable until it wasn’t. Once I felt I had completely lost control, I realized the longest journey I would ever travel would be within myself. So the journey began.
By Nikola Roumeliotis6 years ago in Psyche