Sloan Kettering

The Man with 1000 Masks

What's the point? That is a question I find myself asking myself often. Why should I get out of bed when all I really want to do is drown in the covers of safety? Safety from the outside world the people in it, the people I'm supposed to care about. Safety from the constant fears of being labelled a failure for the entirety of my life, from never accomplishing anything. Safety from another day wasted sitting in my room doing nothing because I don't have the energy or motivation to go out and make something of myself. Awaiting the inevitable text or call to go out and see my friends or loved ones, knowing I'll have to go in my closet and grab a few masks so they never have to know and worry about what is really going on. Being too afraid of social rejection to tell anyone how serious this is in order to get proper help. Everyday pretending to smile and laugh, pretending to care about the new social trends that we're supposed to care about. Realizing how screwed I am when I don't even care who's supposed to be leading our nation. Because who can really lead us? No one has any answers here, we're all just guessing and doing our best to bullshit to the top of the food chain. You sprint through your lives like cheetah chasing a gazelle, while I relate more to the tortoise in a constant state of impending danger. If we must fear the indifference of good men above all else, then I am this worlds greatest threat with my indifference.