Coping with Social Anxiety

According to Mayo Clinic, social anxiety disorder (also known as social phobia) is essentially the feelings of nervousness, such as anxiety, fear, and self-consciousness, during everyday interactions. The most common being the fear of being judged or scrutinized by other people.

Being someone who suffers from severe social anxiety disorder, I felt it would benefit others to know what I have done to help myself cope with this disorder, either through trying different things or what I've been recommended by others. So here are my top three tips for coping with social anxiety disorder:

1. Breathing

I know, I know. It sounds too simple. Breathing should be common sense, especially if you are suffering from an anxiety disorder. But I didn't think it would help me at all. I got this tip from a therapist I was seeing. She told me to count to ten and take deep breaths when I'm in a social situation that is causing the symptoms. It wasn't until months later that I noticed the difference. I was about to take a driving test while visiting my sister and I was getting the big three: shortness of breath, sweating, and racing heartbeat. After doing the breathing exercise, I passed it with no problem. Simple and easy. To this day, I still use this one while driving. It works in all social situations. Try it out, you'll be surprised.

2. Reflection

Reflection. Not the kind you see in the mirror after a shower either. This is more the inner reflection.

Reflecting helps you understand yourself better and allows you some time alone to recharge your batteries. The thing that has always helped me reflect was music. I can listen to music for hours and be lost in the moment and really just think about life and what I can do to change it for the better.

Now, this does have a downside. When you do start to sit down and think about yourself and all these things, one of two things will happen. Either you sit down and your thoughts stay on the course of reflection and self-improvement and that's it, or they start that way and you end up on a path of self-destruction. What I mean by that is you end up considering everything that could go wrong and you convince yourself that it will. You start to tell yourself that it's better to avoid these things and you will be happier. But that's not the truth. You will be "safer," but you won't be happy. Trust me, I'm a world-renowned former procrastinator. I avoided everything that would cause me any kind of discomfort and that's not living.

Sit down and reflect. Put on some music and be in the moment. It may take some time to get it right, but it is worth the work.

3. Take a break.

Sometimes you need a break from reality. Life is demanding for most of us, especially if you suffer from an anxiety disorder, and you need a break from time to time to relax and unwind. For me, that involves taking a break from reality.

My two favorite hobbies are reading and playing video games. The commonality of these two things is the option to escape from real life, if only for a little while. With gaming and reading, I can shut off the real world and turn on a new one. I can be someone else for a little while and have fun or experience a story through some else's eyes. It's helpful to take that time for yourself and one extra benefit is the community. I found a community of supportive people on both the BookTube community and the video game communities I'm a part of. So, find that hobby or activity that helps you escape and make a few friends along the way.

Therapy and Drugs

I could have ended this with the last tip, but I have to mention the most successful and common tools for dealing with an anxiety disorder or depression (which I also have). Therapy is something I'm still working on and medicine is something that didn't really work for me. I have heard a ton of success stories though and I believe they do work, but it is a case by case thing. Each story is different, so obviously different treatments may work while others do not. These are things that have worked for me, so try them out and see what helps. I highly recommend giving therapy a try as well, because normally the anxiety is caused by something that only therapy may help you reach.