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"Crazies"

Think before you speak!

By Crazy UnicornPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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By Lukan-the-OracleDeviant Art

It's the words they use to define you that hurt the most; mental, barmy, drama queen, CRAZY! There's that old saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me." Well, let me tell you something, words do hurt. They really hurt. Especially when it's over something you can't control. No one asks for a mental illness, no one asks to feel depressed, no one asks to feel anxious. It’s not something we choose, it just happens.

I have suffered from anxiety for as long as I can remember. I didn’t know what it was at first. The constant panic attacks, the fear of getting hurt, the paranoia of worrying what people are saying about you. I was formally diagnosed around a year and a half ago. It took me forever to ask for help because I was worried what people would say about me, what they would call me. I didn’t understand what was happening to me so why would anyone else understand? It seems I was right to worry.

Words never used to bother me so much until a few months ago. I was with a group of people. We were talking about a psychiatric hospital that one of them was working at, and one of them said: "That's the hospital with the crazies." I felt so uneasy! I didn't think people used words like that anymore. This person knows nothing of my problems so I know it wasn't directed towards me, but it still hurts.

What made it worse is that another person said the exact same thing and this person is a trainee doctor. When I heard that my first thought was how could we put our trust in people like you if that's how you define people like us? I didn't stay quiet, I told them both that they shouldn't say things like that and both of their responses were something along the lines of "Yeah but that's what they are/" Is it? Is that what we are? Is that what I am? Does the whole world think I'm crazy?

I can’t believe that a healthcare professional could say something like that. They even sort of cringed when telling us about the work they had to do at the psychiatric hospital, saying they haven’t got the patience for that. They were describing the symptoms someone had, saying they can’t be dealing with that. Their job is to help people, not judge them for feeling like that. It’s not their fault they feel like that or have those thoughts. It makes me wary of who I speak to about my anxiety. I can’t deal with being judged. I am constantly on edge, scared that people are talking about me. I shouldn’t care, it’s my life, not theirs, but I can’t help it. It’s not fair that I feel like this, it’s not fair that any of us feel like this.

I know you must be thinking, “What a hypocrite, her name is Crazy Unicorn", but I feel that if I say it I have control over the way I use the word "crazy". It makes me stronger. It sounds stupid but if I can call myself “crazy” then it takes power away from that word, and when other people say it to me it will have no effect.

It's not fair that people with mental health problem have to listen to things like that. The world we live in is becoming more understanding in every aspect, mental health should be one of them. We need to remove the stigma, we need to be free. Words can be fatal, so please think before you speak!

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About the Creator

Crazy Unicorn

I have a lot going on in my life and need a way of letting out all my anger and frustration. I love writing because it really helps me. I can be whoever I want when I'm writing. That is why I have chosen to be anonymous on here.

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