Depression Isn't Really Pretty

With the recent release of Thirteen Reasons Why season 2 and the end of mental health awareness week, the subject of depression, among other things, has unsurprisingly been occupying my mind. What got me wanting to write about it was a conversation I had recently with a friend of mine, triggered by the subject of 13 Reasons Why, and how it portrays suicide and mental health issues. We both agreed that turning suicide into a revenge complex, as the show does, is neither a reasonable, realistic, or healthy way to portray the issue. As someone who has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts, I can tell you that suggesting killing oneself is a good way of getting back at the people who hurt you is not at all helpful. It's the opposite. This turns suicide into a trivial game of blaming others, and there has even been concerns that a suicide numbers among teens will increase due to the amount of people who identify with Hannah's situation and will see death as a viable way of making people care about them.

Another good point that my friend pointed out was that the ugliness of depression is never shown throughout the show. The creators apparently had the intention of showing the "pain and suffering" of suicide, and show the suffering and horror of it through the graphic portrayal of Hannah's death scene, however this is just gory and unnecessary. Despite being a huge trigger for those who have self harmed or even attempted suicide in the past, it doesn't succeed in deterring suicide. Gore is by no means the same thing as a deterrent. In a way, the show seems to glorify suicide and mental health issues, in the same way as these issues are romanticised often on social media sites, in particular by young teens. Depression, self harm, and suicide have become very "tumblr" and thousands of pages are dedicated to posting filtered, "edgy" pictures of pretty girls with cuts accompanied by a beautifully worded, yet morbid caption. This is not real. Depression is not beautiful girls lying on the floor surrounded by flowers. Sometimes it's not being able to get out of bed for the whole day, or longer. It's not wanting to get up and shower, or brush your hair, or clean your teeth. It's not eating for days, or overeating. It's feeling like no one cares about you, like you have no reason to exist. It's not wanting to be alive. It's ugly. You can't just chuck a bath bomb in the tub, have a cup of tea, and feel better, which is what Instagram would have me believe if I didn't know better. This is what needs to be understood in our society. I think there's far too many people who still don't see mental illness as a "real" illness, and believe it's just a mindset you pt yourself in. I can tell you, it's certainly not a choice, otherwise I'm sure we would all choose not to suffer.

What really needs to be shown is the ugliness of depression, not the beauty of it. And we need to stop making it look like a viable option, because it never, ever is. One last complaint about 13 Reasons Why is that they show no other viable option other than suicide. We are never shown that there is always more reasons against suicide than there is in support of it. This is a problem.

I suppose, if nothing else, the series has triggered talk about these mental issues, and perhaps this is a step in the right direction to ending the taboo surrounding mental health. I do understand what the producers of 13 Reasons Why were trying to do with the show, focussing on a topical and serious issue, trying to raise awareness. It is undoubtedly an incredibly difficult subject matter to discuss, and it is unsurprising there has been so much backlash regarding the story. I would, however, like to believe that there are people who have been helped by Hannah's story and have sought help after watching the series, and if that applies to anyone reading this, that is fantastic. It is my personal opinion that the show has done more damage than harm and has gone about tackling the issue in the wrong way. Hopefully in the future we can break down the censorship in a more positive manner, and show that there are always, always other options despite suicide.