Hypnotherapy

Growing up was never going to be easy. You see the films, books, and magazine articles on childhood and teenage struggles. Never do you imagine it’s going to be that bad on you. I thought my parents' relationship with one another was normal and my family dynamic was legit. Trouble was always imminent in my family, but I never thought anything of it, I just considered it the norm. These got worse and worse. Constant fights, abuse, alcohol rages, and suicide threats. I began doing the same at 12 turning to cigarettes, alcohol, and sex. I considered it the way forward and to deal with life in general. I had to be a grown-up to control my situation in my family. Suicide attempts became a regular thing for me as did self-harm and alcohol and drug abuse. As I grew up it got worse. Physiological damage was taking its toll and I was at my lowest ever. Then, at the grand age of 15, I started dating am 18-year-old which turned into a five-year abusive relationship. Alcohol and drugs were now my demons and were my only escape. I regularly turned to alcohol as an escape. Leading to arrests, interventions, and hospital emergencies. Then I met a guy who turned it all upside down, I was struck down wholeheartedly with love. He made me better, my anxiety was still out of control and I was a mess but he somehow put a band-aid on my whole life in a messed up way. I was happy, the happiest I'd been since way beyond my teens. I felt loved, wanted, and needed. But nothing could stop my demons and paranoia from creeping up on me. I fucked it up. One year and five months later, I fucked up big time and he couldn’t deal with my damage. My insecurity, my anxiety, my paranoia, and constant no trust. So this was the biggest wake up of all. I turned to hypnotherapy and it was everything and more. I delved deep into my self, I nurtured my unconscious soul. I listened, I resolved, I dug into memories so painful and hurtful, I put them to bed. I talked to little 12-year-old me with a fucked up family. I realized my issues. I have strong trust issues, a 22-year-old would after her father's affairs, hidden secrets, and constant verbal and physical abuse. I’m not where I want to be in life but I’m getting there. I finally have a doctor who listens and has helped. I’ve had a psychiatric assessment, I’ve been put on the right medication and I have the right support professionally. It may take a long time but you will get there. You just have to hold on and hope.

Mental health is becoming something that is being talked about and understood more. Which is so good! Growing up, mental illness was frowned upon and you were treated like an alien and pushed out for having something wrong with you. No one can understand what’s going on in your troubled little head and you can’t put into words how and what is bringing you down. This is how I think also that hypnotherapy helped me, my mind did the talking and a professional will ask your questions and say things that your mind will just pour out willingly. It also got me to the point where I got given the right help e.g psychiatrists, medication, and support. Which I had been screaming out for, for years!

Everyone’s stories may not be the same but we all want to be heard and understood to get out of the feeling that lies heavily on the mind.

Yes, I lost the best thing to come into my life but I guess that was part of the whole learning process, to get the help I needed.