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Inner Feelings

Don't let it control you.

Nobody understands the inner feelings of another person, but when you try to tell someone your inner feelings, do they even listen to you or try to understand? Well, for most people and myself, that is the case with our lives, inner feelings are complicated for everyone. It's complicated for the people trying to understand and it's even complicated for the people having inner feelings. Having inner feelings is like having another person living inside you that is trying to take over your whole life. Some people give up and let it take over; I should know, I'm one of those people. But I'm slowly learning to get back to being me and not giving in to the urges of the inner feelings. After you give in to these inner feelings it's hard to come back to the real you—hell, I still don't know who the real me is. I gave up a long time ago and lost sight of me and everything I stand for. Don't let those inner feelings take over because they will kill your soul.

What comes with the inner feelings is inner voices, too. The inner voices are the voice for your inner feelings. The voices are going to tell you what to do when your at your lowest. When you listen to them, that's when you really give in to your inner feelings.

Do you ever want people to know your inner feelings without hearing, "you're making this up," "it will all blow over with time," "um, okay, that sounds weird?" Don't you ever just want people to listen instead of give their opinion on your state of mind? Well I do, and I haven't found out a way for people to understand me and understand my problems I go through every single day. My worst fear is that people will treat me differently like they're walking on broken glass around me. If I tell people the truth, I don't want them to treat me any differently. But at the same time, I want people to know the truth about me. I want them to know the truth because it would be nice for someone to talk to for once. I do talk to people about stuff but I bounce around the truth and make up little lies so they don't know the truth. What will people say if they know about my inner feelings and the side effects that come with it? If people know the truth they will understand why I act the way I act sometimes. Sometimes I get a little over-emotional, my mood changes out of nowhere, I shut down form talking to people, and these are some of my side effects of being me. If they know the truth can they really help me, or will they just gossip about me behind my back leaving me a paranoid mess?

I don't really know what the future holds, but I know one thing: I'm not going to let my inner feelings control me again and ruin my life even more than it is now. And if anyone is reading this right now and has similar problems with their inner feelings, then my advice for you is to not let it control you and learn how to be you and focus on what will make you feel better. Letting it control you is like giving your soul to the devil; there's no fully coming back from it. Like I said, you could get some of yourself back over time if you try, but you won't get all of you back. Most of you will disappear into nothing, leaving you broken; most of myself I had to recreate, making me into a whole new different person. The scary part is, I don't even know what my original self is like anymore; I changed and I don't know if this is the real me or the real me got eaten alive by my inner feelings. Inner feelings are scary and real; they're as real as a human being, they can attack you and destroy you. Don't become like me and be broken. I bless all of you to not let your inner feelings get the best of you and be strong... like I wasn't.

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