Psyche is powered by Vocal.
Vocal is a platform that provides storytelling tools and engaged communities for writers, musicians, filmmakers, podcasters, and other creators to get discovered and fund their creativity.
How does Vocal work?
Creators share their stories on Vocal’s communities. In return, creators earn money when they are tipped and when their stories are read.
How do I join Vocal?
Vocal welcomes creators of all shapes and sizes. Join for free and start creating.
To learn more about Vocal, visit our resources.Show less
Family, are supposed to be people that love you, care for you, and protect you. I can't really say that for my family. Well, let me be more specific, my mothers side of the family. I grew up living a lie in my own household. I was sexually abused by my own grandfather, lied to by my own family, and forced to live a lie for 19 years.
When I was young I was mostly with my grandparents because my mother and father worked long hours. I was at my grandparent's house all the time. I would even fake being sick so I can stay at their house and miss school. I grew up thinking they were cool. It was not until my body started to change that I noticed my grandfather played with me differently.
It was not until my grandparents had to move in the efficiency that my parents had in the backyard that I noticed the change completely. It was one afternoon after school that I went to hang out with my grandfather while my grandma was working. He decided that he wanted to put adult videos on for me. He told me that we should play the games they were playing on the television. First, he touched me on my private parts. Then, he made me touch him on his private parts. Those are how the games started out. After he got comfortable he almost raped me. But since I was so little he was not able to fit it in.
After I realized what we were doing was not right I tried to tell my grandmother. She ignored me and did not pay me any attention. So I told my aunt. She did nothing either so I had no choice but to just keep it to myself. I tried telling my parents and they did not care. We had to move to another city. I was hoping that the abuse would stop. But it just kept on.
One day, my grandmother walked in and caught him in the act. She still did nothing about it. He was still doing it even with her knowing about it. On February 15, 2006, something happened in our school. A classmate committed suicide. That day there was a lot of kids crying and emotional. So many counselors to help everyone out. So when I went to speak with a counselor I spoke up about what was going on at home. I was able to catch their attention enough that they sent someone to my house to investigate.
A social worker came over to my house to speak with us and ask a couple of questions. They proceeded to ask my grandfather questions while my grandmother was telling me to tell them that I misunderstood him and he did not mean it. I had no other choice but to do it because she is my grandmother and I am supposed to trust that she will protect me.
I guess after that stunt I pulled my grandfather did not want to keep on touching me because he was afraid I was going to tell someone else and get him into trouble. For so many years after that, I struggled with relationships. Keeping a secret like that was very hard. I was rebellious toward my parents. I would have unprotected sex to purposely get pregnant to be legally emancipated.
I met the love of my life on July 22, 2009. I was fifteen years old. I confessed to him the horrible thing that happened to me. He never looked away. He decided to accept me for me. He would try to keep me away from my family to protect me. We kept trying to get pregnant so I can move out. It finally happened three years after meeting. I was 17 years old when I left my house and the man who abused me for all those years and I was finally free. Free from the pain of having to live with people who did nothing but put me in harm's way.
I hope that my story inspires any women or young woman who have been through sexual abuse to speak up. Even though it is hard and you think no one will listen or cares. There will be that one person that cares enough to make that difference for you. No matter who it is, speak out!!
DO NOT BE AFRAID!