The Voice of My Anxiety

Fighting my anxiety is a daily battle. No matter what I am dealing with, working at, doing, or trying to plan, it likes to find faults and stop me. Listed below are some things my anxiety tells me regularly.

Don’t bother getting out of bed today, it’s not like you will do anything important.

*Phone Rings.* Me: It's my boss. My Anxiety: He's going to fire you.

Did you shave your legs today? Be careful or you’ll look like a yeti soon enough.

Is that a hair on your chin? I guess you’ll be the next bearded woman.

You’re an idiot.

Mom: Wow, this is really good! Me: Thanks! Anxiety: She is lying. It is awful, but she just doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.

Don’t ask her to hangout. She will just say no.

You got some paint on the floor. You’re useless.

You aren’t worth the time.

Don’t apply to grad school, you won’t succeed.

Don’t bother to write. You will never get anywhere with it.

Your father loves his new family more than he loves you. I can see why.

You’re ugly.

Me: Hi (insert name here)! Nice to see you again! Anxiety: Dip shit, you got their name wrong.

Don’t walk around while you eat. You will choke and no one will find your body for days. At least the cats would enjoy you though.

If you don’t lock that door someone will break in and murder you.

Don’t buy that. People are watching you and judging you.

You shouldn’t wear that, it makes your rolls of fat stand out.

*Boyfriend is at a party.* He has not responded for 25 minutes now. Anxiety: Obviously he is cheating on you.

You smell bad.

There is no way he really loves you.

Your family can see how useless you are.

Don’t respond to that message too fast. He will think you’re clingy and leave you.

Me: I could paint that. Anxiety: Why bother? You won’t do a good job anyways.

If you go to sleep, you may not wake up.

You will never get out of your dead-end job. You are stuck for life.

People watch your fat jiggle while you run at the gym.

You gave an awful gift. He will hate you forever now.

Me: Did I shut the oven off? Anxiety: Nope. Your house will be burnt to a crisp when you get home. I hope you didn’t like those cats too much.

You’re going to be late. You will never be forgiven for this.

You are fat and you have rosy cheeks. If you wear red you will look like a tomato. People will expect you to roll away, not walk.

Was there a cat around when you closed the door? I hope you didn’t get their paw or tail stuck in the door.

Your display looks awful. You don’t have a creative bone in your body.

People don’t come into the store because they don’t like you and don’t want to deal with you.

Did someone hack your laptop so they could spy on you through the webcam? Probably.

You don't deserve happiness.

Just be quiet. You have nothing valuable to contribute.