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To whom it may concern,
I lived. It is a simple statement that so many in this world will never get the chance to say. I didn’t live in the sense of a near death or an almost OD and now my life has changed. I lived in a way of learning to love and appreciate life within the obstacles that had been placed upon me. These obstacles and feelings and hard times started at an early age in a normal household with a loving Christian family a place you would not expect, But I LIVED.
I lived through heartbreak, trust issues, depression, suicidal thinking, and now I live with a mental illness that will never go away, but I still LIVE. Most people think that once diagnosed with an illness you are a stigma you are what the labled you and for awhile it made me act out. It made me want to prove everyone right so they would stop looking at me in pity. I learned quickly no one was looking that way except me and until I let go and enjoyed life for what it was accepting the cards God had given me I would always feel that way.
The world will always try to tear us down there will always be something to hurt us and break us, but we can and should fight through. We have lost great artists, brothers, sisters,and friends to a stigma that says we can not live. We will always be depressed nothing gets better and no one cares until you're dead. That is the stigma that we have built for this generation and this society and I am not having it. I will not stand by while we are all told that no one matters until they are dead and you can not be happy while sick.
Living is so much more than breathing and with society the way it is now it is hard to accept that we can be happy, but even being permanently mentally ill here is some advice that I have taken and live by on how to truly live. Step outside and enjoy nature is an easy one we all have somewhere that is outside so go there and enjoy it. When there is any moment with friends or yourself that you are laughing or smiling breathe it in and when life feels pointless recall it remember that you are important. Spend the $10 and go out it may be your last ten dollars and you don’t get paid for two days, but unless you need gas go out. Be happy live the fullest life you can and accept the things you can not change.
I will always be who I am you will always be who you are, but today I felt the need to tell you that I lived. I chose to do this because looking at someone who made it through who does live is sometimes easier to listen to than someone telling you to live. On a final note I am urging you to live to not die. To put the gun down to love. I am urging you to smell the roses and know that you are loved.
Someone who chooses to live.