When Dreams Don't Come

Dreams are important.

While I meant that in a literal sense, I do agree it’s also probably not a bad idea to have hopes and goals and shit.

But I am talking about the kind of dreams that process the day’s activities as you sleep.

After sustaining multiple concussions in the past year, I was left with having to deal with a Traumatic Brain Injury. (In addition to a lot of trauma, but less on that at this time.)

When my brain was doing its weird ass healing process, DMT was releasing from my pineal gland during my waking hours… in abnormally large amounts.

For those that don’t know what DMT is… I highly suggest you read “DMT: The Spirit Molecule.”

In short, it’s a naturally occurring compound that is found in every living thing, and somewhat molecularly similar to serotonin and melatonin.

Scientists hypothesize it the secret ingredient for dreams.

They also speculate that massive amounts of the chemical are released into your brain as you die, causing those near death experiences people have spoken about, when they're clinically dead and see the “light”.

I have been technically dead twice in my life, my most recent experience being a decade ago. However, those experiences, albeit strange, were nothing in comparison to the past year.

Shortly after the first concussion in the series (the one that fractured my skull), I stopped dreaming. Now the skeptical ones (myself included) are going to say I just lost recall of my dreams. I would usually tend to agree, except when the constant tripping balls phase started to happen after the third or fourth concussion in a four month period.

Things started getting weird, and I started “day tripping” - a lot.

Now, I’ve experimented with a lot of drugs in my day, especially hallucinogens, but never synthetically created DMT, so all the speculation on my part is just that… Maybe one day, I will have the privilege of comparing DMT - you know, for science. Lol.

Some events of recent months defy all earthly and rational explanation. Maybe one day I will further go into what I meant by that, but it is far too extensive of an experience for this post. I mean, how can one explain tapping into the Akashic Field and learning Everything the Universe has to offer? You don’t.

Because of the very “spiritual” aspects of this chemical, I eventually got to the point where I truly believed I was dead, and kept having to call my family to make sure this was NOT the case.

There was another point where I was having olfactory hallucinations of roses, wood fires, asphalt and medical antiseptic - all comforting smells to me that reminded me of my deceased parents. While it was comforting, there were points where I became utterly terrorized. More on that another time.

It wasn’t until about two weeks ago that I recall having my first dream in nearly a year. It was also about the time the “trippiness” of life has also calmed down to a somewhat “normal” point.

Dreams are necessary to the human brain, just like software updates are important to a computer.

Without them, my perspective was very askew. (Sometimes that wasn’t a bad thing.) My cognitive abilities were negatively impacted, and a lot of logic did go out the metaphorical window.

But as I’ve said once, and will say a million times over again, when I lost complete control and let the spiritual aspect of the DMT take over, I was able to let go of so much pain, torment, and even the lies I have told myself… And when I did that, it was seriously as if I had 25-30 years of therapy in less than a year.

We should totally study the effects of this drug for not only terminally ill patients, but people with immense psychological pain.