Yes, You Can Find Somebody Who Will Accept You and Your Anxiety

Having anxiety and in the dating world at the same time sounds scary and intimidating.

Well, because it can be. It's scary to think that you might meet someone great, somebody who you've been looking for and as soon as you tell them about your anxiety, they run. They run so far away and you think that you'll never be able to find love again.

There’s also the person that you meet, things are going great, then you tell them about what you deal with. They don’t only tell you that “It’s just all in your head,” but that taking any type of medication to help you, whether it’s long-term or short-term, is wrong and they’ll leave you for it.

Those people could also tell you that it's just "all in your head, and you need to calm down," or try to yell at you for trying to finally take a medication to help you.

If the person you are interested in does any of those things, you need to start looking for other people to date.

But, it is scary. When I started to put myself out there in the dating world, I was nervous that my anxiety would scare someone away. I was scared that I wouldn't be accepted for who I am, since I wasn't in my last relationship. I did date someone who told me that my anxiety is a lie, it's all in my head and that if I did decide to start taking medication, that he would leave me because, "Medication is a bunch of BS and you'll just end up addicted and crazy."

Not only did he make me feel like I was a horrible person for making myself feel better, I let him control me. I let him tell me what to do, as if he was a licensed therapist or a doctor who could help me figure it out. How could I date somebody who let me feel this way and make it seem like mental illness (as minimal as my anxiety to say bipolar disorder) as something that’s made up? Last time I checked, this isn’t the 1800s, people are actually licensed to help people with their mental health, because that’s just as important and sometimes more important than physical health.

Yeah, I really dated a winner.

Once I finally broke that horrible relationship off, I finally started something new with myself. I did take my time and let myself be sad, because even though it was a toxic relationship and he ultimately made my anxiety worse, it still is sad when someone you thought you were going to have around for a long time is someone who ended up being a person you didn't actually really know. It's sad, but take that in stride and realize you are worth more than they ever could give you.

When I finally met the person whom I believe I am meant to spend the rest of my life with, it was like meeting a person you feel like you've known forever. He listened to me (I tend to ramble on, whoops) and actually cared about what I had to say. He cared about me and my well-being.

He didn't run away when I told him I deal with anxiety on a diagnosed level. He stayed, and understands where I come from, because he deals with it too.

I'm not saying you need to find somebody that deals with it too. I'm saying that the person you date next needs to be somebody that won't run away, or will be willing to learn and help you in any way that they can, even if that means just holding you while you feel numb, while you feel like you need to cry for so many reasons.

Find a person who loves you for you, anxiety and depression included.