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You Can't Give Yourself Likes for Making It Through the Day... But You Should

Why a Little Self Care Can Go a Very Long Way

By S PPublished 5 years ago 3 min read
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In my book, “Your Mental Health and You,” one of the things I emphasize is the relationship we have with ourselves. One aspect of how we can either strengthen or weaken that relationship is through self care. Especially around the holiday season, we hear self care a lot and there is a good reason for that, self care should be a part of our lives and is vital to every aspect of our well-being. Some days we may need it a little or a lot more self care than other days. Especially during the holiday season or certain life events; this can make self care incredibly difficult at times!

Self care isn’t selfish, I want you to answer the following question: out of all the following relationships which one is more important?

A.Your familyB. Your friends or acquaintancesC. The person you are dating are married to or datingD. Work colleaguesE. None of the above

The answer is E because the most important relationship that trumps all of those is, can you guess what I am going to say. That’s right, it’s the relationship you have with you!

We have a tendency to put others ahead of our own needs, and we really shouldn’t. We need to take care our own psychological, emotional, and physical well-being as one of our top priorities. Also, remember that taking time to do this is selfless, not selfish. Selfless is taking others needs over your own, but sometimes that other person should be the one who you see in your mirror every day because they need love too.

So remember instead of saying things to yourself such as: “I don’t have time,” “I don’t want to be a burden,” or anything really that involves putting your own needs on the metaphorical back burner. Take the time and put in the effort to deal with them. You can just take a few minutes a day or depending on the severity of the problem take a lot longer to deal with it as long as you deal with it in a healthy way.

According to the Canadian Mental Health Association, self care is defined in the following way: “Self-care means taking small steps to live a healthy lifestyle every day.”

Putting off things such as grieving or our emotional well being in general, may at the time seem like the right thing to do, but here is a little thing to remember: have you ever heard the saying don’t sweat the little things? With psychological issues, when you have this mindset, the little things turn into very big things and makes them more complicated to deal with and understand.

Remember that seeking the help of qualified professionals are talking to a person who understands you is so much better than not talking to anyone or talking to someone who doesn’t have your best interests at heart. Even if you think that you are being a burden or selfish communicating your issues or problem. I promise you that if a person is a good friend they will listen and your doctor or therapist will do the same.

Remember that seeking the help of qualified professionals are talking to a person who understands you is always so much better than either not talking to anyone or talking to someone who doesn’t have your best interests at heart. Even if you think that you are being a burden or selfish, communicating your issues or problem. I promise you that if a person is a good friend, they will listen and your doctor or therapist will do the same.

“In order to discover and ultimately be successful in being the person you wish to become, you need to first fully understand yourself. Having a complete truthful knowledge of who you are is undoubtedly one of the most important steps in your growth as it can help you in so many avenues you may encounter.

It can help you recognize negative triggers and thus, be able to not only cope with these triggers but also to deal with them in a manner which will produce positive results, instead of ignoring them. Understanding yourself and why you feel as you do, can produce many positive results in your life such as your ability to develop more positive coping skills; bringing about a positive improvement to your overall health in general.” —Your Mental Health and You

A few self care tips are:

  1. Don’t let toxic people dictate your self worth.
  2. Set healthy boundaries.
  3. Remember that self care is different for everyone.
  4. Do things you enjoy.
  5. Take advice from people who have your best interests in mind.
  6. Learn from your mistakes.
  7. Do things you enjoy by yourself or with others.
  8. Don’t feel bad for taking time for yourself.
  9. Don’t fall back on unhealthy habits instead develop more effective ways to overcome those things through healthy coping skills. I recommend this to be done with the help of a therapist if needed.
  10. Focus on the things that you are in control over as a start.

Lastly, take the little wins with the big ones and remember this quote: what do big steps and small steps forward have in common? They are both moving in the same direction and remember those little steps will eventually turn into gigantic leaps, be patient and resilient. Also, remember that self care is different for everyone, so do what’s best for you. Through the guidance from a qualified professional and remember that it’s okay to sometimes not be okay.

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About the Creator

S P

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